It wasn’t long after I finished my last post that Peanut showed me a message he’d received on Facebook saying that a friend of his had passed away on New Year’s Eve. It seemed he had a massive stroke, and had quite suddenly slumped sideways in his chair, and just died. He was 40, just turned.

It’s something that draws into stark relief how fragile and fleeting life actually is. And it draws your attention to missed chances. We’d been invited to his surprise 40th birthday party, and had passed up the chance because our weekend was already booked. His death stirs a small amount of regret that maybe, if we’d known, we’d have gone to the party and seen him. I’d been messaging him on Facebook via Comments only a few weeks before New Years Eve. It’s strange, from where I sit. I barely knew him, and had never met him, but I cannot deny that I felt sad when I saw that message. And still do.

Of course, we can’t get hung up on “What if”‘s in our lives, can we? If we knew many things were going to happen in the future, would it alter our paths? Should it? I’m a great believer that things happen for a reason. We don’t know what the future holds for good reason.

Mostly, though, my heart goes out to his family. There was no real rhyme or reason to his death. If he’d died in another way, then blame may be apportioned. Although this doesn’t bring somebody back, sometimes it aids the grieving process. But they have no one and nothing to blame. It was random, truly. If you were religious, you might ask why would God enforce this on a loving family? Why would God force parents to bury their child? If you aren’t religious, it’s still a question you’ll probably ask. Why? Why him? Why now? They’re questions which will never be answered. My heart, our heart, go out to his parents and his family in this most difficult time of all.

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